I am an early riser.
This morning, it was 2:30 a.m. (No, that isn’t a typo.)
It’s been this way for some years now, for varying reasons. Most, I believe, are physical but not all. Certainly, in the last few weeks, that hasn’t been the case.
It’s the stuff in my head.
For almost two years, the whole “C” thing – and all that entailed – caused many a sleepless nights. I don’t think that’s unusual. Recently, it’s something – or, rather, some things – other than that.
Odd dreams where I’ve seen the same “terrorist” looking guy more than once. Wondering how this whole ‘end of life’ thing with Mom is going to play out. Worrying about my daughters health, our finances, what I’m going to make for dinner.
And then there’s the circus called the U.S. Presidential elections. Wish I could say, “Not my circus, not my monkeys”, but – unfortunately – this circus very much impacts our lives and I have a natural political bent even in the best of times. With this Freak Show, I’ve been consumed with what’s going on, what’s being revealed, and what is being kept secret.
It’s one thing to have concerns – even fears – about external foes: ISIS, Russia, Iran, North Korea, China. The terms “World War III” and “Nuclear Weapons” are being bandied about a lot these days, and it’s scary stuff – especially when you consider who has their finger on the button (be it a suitcase or an Oval Office).
God help us all.
It’s a whole thing altogether, though, when you realize your own government is bad to the bone, and We The People are really just pawns in their Game of Thrones. We now need protection from the very institution that was created to protect us! The Washington Elite and the Global Cabal have made it clear that they could care less about us. We are disposable to them.
And just typing that makes me want to smack someone, or scream, or stick my head in the sand (or in a bottle of booze) and pretend it all away.
I’m REALLY going to need a mental cleanse after November 8th (if not before)
Knowing it’s futile to lay there in bed and try to think my thoughts away, I got up, and played Gin Rummy for a couple of hours. It distracts me. It breaks the cycle of worry. It can even be fun. But it doesn’t necessarily make me feel better.
With an hour to go before people started stirring about, I had enough of that and did what I should have done from the start: I poured myself a fresh cuppa, sat at my little kitchen table, lit a candle, and prayed.
Within a few minutes, it started to rain again. Gently at first, and then in big fat sheets. Blessed, wonderful, Hot Damn! rain! It sprinkled here on and off all day yesterday, with even some thunder and lightening thrown in, and I swear I could hear Earth groan with pleasure. Even one day of rain in drought racked SoCal is a huge deal. The air gets fresh, Nature get a quick wash down, and the temp actually drops below 75.
When I heard the thunder start up again, I threw open my kitchen door, stepped outside and looked North where huge bolts of lightning lit up the dark. Great rolling claps of thunder sounded overhead, and I could just see the shapes of the clouds in the predawn light. It looked like a massive rib cage, with a giant Heart in the center. The thought crossed my mind to try to capture it in a photo, but I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to chance missing IT.
I wanted to praise!
Raising my hands and relishing in the beauty of the Storm, I recalled reading that God’s Voice is as thunder, and His appearance as lightning. It made what I was witnessing even more beautiful, and it seemed the bolts were in sync with my thoughts. My mind was being cleansed and refreshed with Living Water.
And that’s when I heard, “Grandma! Grandma Can you hear it?!?” Padding into the kitchen, his eyes bright and wide, his hair tousled with sleep, was my Angel.
Pushing back into the kitchen, I stepped inside and said “Yes, Bub! I sure do! Isn’t it awesome? Come here and let’s watch!”
And just then the kitchen – and my heart – glowed with Light. Holding his little body in front of mine, we stood and watched and clapped and laughed with pure joy at every clap of thunder and every bolt of lightning. Oh, what a miracle!
I’m still smiling about it.
You gave abundant showers, O God,
You refreshed your weary inheritance.